News & Events

Note to Self: Don’t Kill

If you are one of two thousand people waiting outside of a large chain store, waiting for your chance to get an awesome Black Friday deal on a plasma TV, a few things should be apparent to you.

  • First, the crowd surrounding you is mix of old, young, frail and hale; however, even the young and spry possess, at best, a rather breakable human body.
  • Second, it should occur to you that two thousand people will not fit through a narrow opening simultaneously. Physics, bitches.
  • Third, when two thousand people begin running toward said narrow entrance, a bottleneck will occur. This will likely result in bodily harm to mob members as well as any hapless individual in the mob’s path.

Some may blame Wal-Mart for today’s death and multiple injuries and yes, I agree, this store appeared to be negligent but people ran. over. that. man. and. killed. him.

I wonder what those first couple hundred people through those doors this morning must be thinking now, as they watch the story recapped on the evening news on their brand new fifty inch plasma TVs.